A few weeks ago while facilitating a seminar; a friend of mine purchased a nutritional juice beverage for me. As I sat and read the label I was struck by one of the suggestions that the product made. It simply said this, “shake well, separation is natural”. As I sat and pondered this statement, it struck my heart deeply as I realized how much of our time is spent grieving over loss. We grieve over the loss of loved ones, time, youth, energy, work, etc. Grief is an appropriate emotion for us to experience. However, it is not appropriate for us to entertain and marinate in for extended periods of time. Grief’s adverse effects on our emotional state contribute to the loss of focus on what is currently happening and it does not allow us to engage in the moments as they arrive. When we extend our grief longer than necessary, we then grieve even more over the time now lost in addition to what we were originally grieving. The mental toll that it takes on us affects our thoughts and beliefs. It takes away our ability to reason with the current information. It brings in past memories and assumptions to dilute what is true. It also causes us to lose focus on what is important. The most significant toll is the loss of gratitude and the inability to see the things we are grateful for rather than lamenting over those that are lost. Please don’t misunderstand, grief is appropriate and applicable when it is used to heal and let go of loss. But, “Separation is natural”. It is not appropriate to marinate or dwell in the past for so long that it means we lose today.
Value Based Life Coach